Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
