Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
no you cant smoke seaweed
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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