Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Randomize