girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
