i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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