Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
