i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
