Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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