Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
