idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
