Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
PANTIES FOUND
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