I got chris browned last night
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
