She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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