i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
