Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Ketchup is God's man juice
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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