then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
