That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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