It was confusing and full of hummus
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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