Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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