We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
