I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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