NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
