I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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