so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
