You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
