Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Another day, another engagement, another cat
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
