no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize