you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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