im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize
