An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
