roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
i've created a new STD.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
