Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
