he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
