It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
