? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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