I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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