Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize