She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
