I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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