We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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