So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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