ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
