Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
