im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
My ass is underappreciated
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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