i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize