smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
