We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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