Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
