it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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