can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize