I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
i now understand why vodka
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
