I'm going to jail i love you
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
