Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Hippo gnu deer
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
